17 - Dick
I'm sure he's thinking: "An early vacation
means more time to spend my extension money!"

The Buffalo Bills: A season that began with such hope-lifting promise (5-1 through the first six games) ended with a soul-crushing thud after the Patriots shut them down with a 13-0 shutout, which made the Bills 2-8 since Dick Jauron and the Bills agreed on the terms of his three-year contract extension. It was New England's 11th straight win over their division rivals. Although a team usually has to win a game or two in a series to earn the title of "rival." Anyway, the Buffalo Chips just seemed to lack preparation and focus since Jauron's extension agreement, leading to confusion, sloppy play and lots and lots of turnovers. And this was epitomized by the following killer sequence that occurred late in the first half:

Their biggest miscue came in the final minute of the second quarter with Buffalo threatening to score. With no timeouts, 22 seconds left and facing third-and-5 from the Patriots 12, the Bills ran Fred Jackson up the middle for a 3-yard gain. Though it was initially unclear whether he got the first down as officials were late in spotting the ball, the Bills immediately sent out their field goal unit.

Buffalo, however, couldn't get a play off amid the confusion and didn't get any help from Bills tight end Derek Schouman and center Duke Preston. They were involved in shoving matches with Patriots players at the 5, making it impossible for the team to line up before time ran out.

Steratore said umpire Jeff Rice did, in fact, spot the ball with 9 seconds left, and added that Bills players were not restricted from returning to the line of scrimmage.
And, at the end of it all, Lee Evans was left to try and explain why it all went so very wrong. "It's been a trying season. We weren't used to winning at the beginning of the season, so you can learn as much as you can from that. Learning how to win is key."

17 - herm
The Second Worst Coach in Pro Football.

Kansas City Chiefs: The Chiefs had the dishonor of duking it out with the Bengals on the final day of the regular season for the right to be named The Second Worst Team in Professional Football. True, losing "only" tied them with the Rams at 2-14, but finishing the season with a defeat to the (at the time) three-win Sad Tigers acted as a sort of 'bawful tie-breaker. Hail to the Chiefs! Only the Lions were worse than you in 2008!

Not-fo-fun facts: The Chiefs, who just suffered through the worst season in their 49-year history, have lost 23 of their last 25 games. Furthermore, they had one sack on the day, which means they finished the season with 10. Otherwise known as "the fewest by any team since the NFL made sacks an official statistic in 1981." Dude, I leave the grocery store with more sacks than they had this year.

Larry Johnson: Johnson, who rushed 10 times for 18 yards, could have just walked out quietly, dealt with his issues, then tried to calmly discuss an exit strategy with team management during the offseason. He chose, however, to do the opposite. The man who got arrested TWICE during the season for assaulting a woman said after the game: "Hopefully, my future is not with this organization. The things that have been going around, I'm not saying it's (all) their fault. Half of it is mine with off-the-field (stuff) and other things that go on. On the football field, my role definitely diminished once I got back. I felt like I wasn't getting as much (work) as I thought I could and helped as much as I could. They shifted their powers to other players on this team offensively. You kind of feel your time is up in this city and with this team. It's the environment. It's got everything to do with the environment. It's what everybody needs. The city is tired of me. The organization has kind of run its course (for him). It's time to move on regardless of what kind of changes they could make. I've been here when they made other changes. It's just time to let go." Larry Johnson: Proving once again there's a "Me, me, me!" in team. If you say "team" three times. And spit on a woman in a night club.

Cedric Benson: Ced "I hit the defensive line then take a dive" Benson -- who, prior to week 16, had managed three 100-yard game IN HIS CAREER -- finished with back-to-back centuries against the woeful Browns (171 yards on 38 carries) and the woefuler Chiefs (111 yards on 25 carries). And, hey, wouldn't you know it...he's a free agent after this season! Imagine my complete and total lack of surprise. Said Benson: "Of course there will be other organizations interested." I just can't wait to see what team gets suckered into signing Benson and then watching him sink contentedly back into sub-mediocrity. We have probably seen Ced's last 100 yard game.

17 - lions

The Detroit Lions: Well. It's official. The Lions Zeroes are the first 0-16 team in NFL history. That's not just "Worst Team This Season" matrerial. That's "Worst Team Ever" stuff. This season of woe was so bad, so gut-wrenchingly terrible, that even guys like Dan Orlovskey, who frankly is lucky to even be in the league, would rather retire and become a beet farmer than suffer through an encore performance of 0-16: "I don't ever want to be a part of this again. We haven't won since, November of '07, maybe? I don't even know the last time we won a game." It was December 23, 2007, actually. But it feels like much longer than that.

Coach Rod Mariwhatever, who's 10-38 in three seasons as the Zeroes' coach, said: "No competitor wants to go through something like this. This is not fun to go through, obviously. But there's people going through a lot worse than this." Oh, sure, Rod. People die of disease. Old ladies die and have their face eaten off by cats. But we're not discussing The Plight of the Command Man here. We're talkin' 'bout football. And no team in the history of your league has ever gone through something worse than this. Not even the Chiefs! (See above.)

Kevin Smith: Look, I can understand why Smith is frustrated, playing for the Zeroes and all, but with his team trying to rally late in the game and in Packers territory, Smith got called for a taunting penalty that moved the Zeroes back to midfield...after which Orlovsky tossed a pick. Game over. Said Smith: "It was a very bad, selfish decision. I let my emotions get the best of me. It was tough, but it is no excuse." And he couldn't even keep his head during a frantic, end-of-game, do-0r-die, we-must-win-or-be-winless situation. Doesn't that just kind of epitomize everything that's wrong with this team?

17 - bears

The Chicago Bears: Making the playoffs was never a certainty for the Bears, but, in the end, all they had to do was beat the sub-.500 Texans and they would have made it into the postseason as a Wild Card team. And, of course, it didn't happen. The Bears were once again skewered by the passing game -- Matt Schaub sliced them for 328 yards and 2 TDs while Andre Johnson diced them for 148 yards and 2 TDs -- and gave up 455 yards of total offense...which was a season-high for a Bears' opponent. And mind you, this was essentially a one-game mini-playoff. That's some serious defensive fail's what that is. Speaking of which...

Danieal Manning: The worst of Chicago's many bad defensive plays came in the second quarter when Manning botched his coverage, which led to a 43-yard touchdown for Andre Johnson. Said Manning: "I bit on the run and blew the coverage. [Coach Lovie Smith] just said, 'Stay deep, we really don't need you on the run support in cover-2. That was just me trying to play outside the defense. I should have been more patient than what I was. I thought I read run, it wasn't. It was a good play call by them, bad play by me."

If only that had been Manning's only mistake. On the ensuing kickoff, while he was fighting for extra yards, he fumbled it at the Bears' 38. Houston recovered and eight plays later scored another touchdown to take a 14-10 lead they would never surrender.

David Haugh: Yesterday, the front of the Chicago Tribune's sports section featured a story by Haugh titled Bears have big mental edge over Vikings. The subhead was "Bears' focused approach a stark contrast to Vikings." The article went on to infer that a Chicago victory was pretty near certain...as was a Minnesota loss. Instead, the Bears flopped while the Vikes pulled out a last-second win over the Giants' scrubs. Haugh also said: "But remember, the Bears' defense typically gets tougher where the Texans' offense stalls." Good calls, one and all, David. You're a regular Nostrodumbass. Thanks for stat cursing my team.

17 - vince
Getting knocked around? Oh yeah, that's
a great way to go into the playoffs...

The Tennesee Titans / Vince Young: Yes, they were resting their starters, but getting shut out is never a good thing. Put it this way, can you ever remember a team getting shut out in the final game of the regular season and then going on to win the Super Bowl. Yeah. Me neither. Of course, to hear Jeff Fisher tell it, that was all part of the plan. "They're playing very, very well, but there's a chance we may play them again, so we just lined up and played today." Well, I sure hope Jeff get a chance to show off all those fancy secret plays he's holding onto for that Colts-Titans playoff matchup that might never happen.

Vince Young: With Fisher resting the starters, Young -- who once was Tennessee's Man of Tomorrow -- got plenty of PT. His response: A 55-yard, zero touchdown performance in which he was badly outdueled by Jim Sorgi, Peyton Manning's never-used backup, who finished 22-of-30 for 178 yards.

More telling than his performance, however, was what people were saying about him after the game. Or, more accurately, what they weren't saying. When asked to evaluate Young's performance, Jeff Fisher said: "I'd have to watch the film." When asked the same question, Kerry Collins said: "It's hard to say without looking at film." Okay, so presumably, Fisher and Collins spent the day wearing a soundproof rubber BDSM hood. Anyway, I'm interested in what they'll have to say about Young after they get a chance to check the film...

17 - sean

The New Orleans Saints: Drew Brees fell 16 yards short of breaking Dan Marino's single-season NFL record of 5,084 yards passing and the Saints fell 2 points short of beating the Panthers and finishing with a winning record (even though they had already been eliminated from playoff contention). And that's just the kind of year it's been for the Saints: A season of falling just short. And you can pin the blame on the defense, which gave up 178 rushing yards to DeAngelo Williams and 134 receiving yards to Steve Smith had 134. Whenever the Saints needed a stop, they consistently failed to get it. Making them sort of the Chicago Bears of the deep south.

17 - romeo

The Cleveland Browns: Ben Roethlisberger got knocked out of the game with a concussion and the Browns STILL lost 31-0. And, thanks to the previous week's 13-0 defeat at the claws of the Sad Tigers, the Browns were shut out in successive games for the first time in franchise history.

But wait. There's more. The Browns offense ended the season by failing to score a touchdown for six games and 24 quarters. Which, in case you couldn't guess it, is an NFL record. Moreover, Cleveland threw for only 26 yards against the Steelers, which tied for the second-fewest in club history. Historic fail, my friends.

Said Romeo Crennel: "We're going to leave here, go back and have a final meeting tomorrow, but we'll go into the offseason seeing what we can do better and get more competitive." Step one, I would think, would be finding a new coach...

Bruce Gradkowski: The fourth and worst QB to start this season for the Browns, Gradkowski finished 5-for-16 for 18 yards, 2 interceptions and 3 sacks. He even had one stretch in which he didn't complete a pass for nearly 27 minutes. He ended up with a QB rating of 1.0.

17 - bucs

The Tampa Bay Buccanneers: Look, I hate to say I told ya so...but I so totally told ya so. I took some early-season heat for not believing in the Bills and Bucs, but my lack of faith, while disturbing to some, turned out to be completely, totally and in all other ways justified. Are we all good with that now? Okay then...

...all the Bucs had to do to make the playoffs, as it turns out, was win one of their final four games. They did not. And the final game, a 31-24 homefield flameout to the lowly Oakland Raiders in which Michael Bush rushed for a career-high 177 yards, was the big gulp of toilet water washing down the bitter pill of regrets. Regarding the biggest collapse in franchise history, Warrick Dunn said: "There's disbelief. There's shock. There's emotions, I'm sure, that I can't really describe. To be 9-3, and you lose four in a row when all you have to do is win one and you're in, it's tough to swallow. The guys in this locker room have prepared hard, played hard. Things haven't gone our way." Added Jeff Garcia: "I know we let down a lot of people...and we apologize for that. We, as a team, are better than what we have put on the field in the last four weeks." It's kind of easy to say that now that you don't have to prove it, Jeff. Maybe next year. Assuming you're still here.

The Jacksonville Jaguars: The team that was supposed to supplant the Colts as the power in the AFC South finished a 5-11 season by going out with a 27-7 whimper to the Baltimore Ravens. And it sure feels like their time as a rising power came and went already, doesn't it?

17 - Jets

The New York Jets: They cut Chad Pennington and went all-in on Brett Favre, only to watch Penninton play like a Pro Bowler, leading Miami from 1-15 to 11-5 and a division title, while old man Brett finished the season looking very much like an old man who should have stayed retired when he had the chance. Mind you, the Jets ended the season dropping four of their last five games -- including losses to the 49ers and Seahawks -- to plummet out of the playoff picture. And now they're looking toward an offseason of Favre (233 yards, 1 TD, 3 INTs) yanking them around as he tries to make up his mind whether or not to retire, unretire, stay retired, etc.

17 - Boys

The Dallas Cowboys: Tony Kornheiser's pick after Week 3 to not only reach but WIN the Super Bowl...didn't even make the playoffs. Now, all they had to do was wipe that dysfunction off their faces and win one of their final two games. But they did not. And the regular season finale, a 44-6 butt-whomping by the Eagles, was insult and injury to their insult and injury. Tony Romo, who threw for 183 yards and an interception, is now 5-8 in the month of December, otherwise known as "Money Time." Romo is all grins and giggles when things are going well, but he's rather grim-faced when they are not. After suffering a rib injury during the game and reportedly passing out in the shower afterward, Romo was asked how he deals with defeat. His answer: "I wake up tomorrow and I keep living." Awh. Don't you just wanna give him a cookie or something?

Not-so-fun-fact: The 'Boys have lost nine consecutive season finales.

17 - mcnabb
Who's a big, whining douchebag? This guy!

Donovan McNabb: I know I'm supposed to be impressed and amazed by his leadership and Philly's return from the playoff grave and all that...but seriously, I cannot stand Donovan McNabb. He's one of the biggest, whiniest crybabies when things aren't going his way, but he's all grins and giggles and flexing when they are. I feel sorry for whatever team ends up with his next season...

The AFC West: I think this nugget from the AP recap of the Broncos-Chargers game sums it up best: "The Chargers won their third straight division title by finishing 8-8, becoming the first team to go from 4-8 to the playoffs by routing the Denver Broncos 52-21 in the Ed Hochuli Bowl on Sunday night." Some additional not-so-fun facts: "The Chargers became the first team to win a division at 8-8 since the Cleveland Browns did it in 1985. They're the ninth team overall to make it to the playoffs at 8-8; only two of the previous teams to do it managed to win a game in the playoffs." The 2008 San Diego Chargers: Joining the ranks of the NFL's historically mediocre teams. Congrats!

17 - cutler
Awh. Don't feel bad, Jay. At least you have
a stronger arm than John Elway!

The Denver Broncos: They spent the first 16 weeks of the 2008 season in first place in the AFC West...and all they had to do to clinch the division was win one of their final three games...but they did not. And, much like the Cowboys, they bowed out in dramatically 'bawful fashion, losing by 31 to the suddenly playoff-bound Chargers. And Brandon Marshall kind of summed up the lackadaisical attitude of a team that wandered aimlessly through the season when he said: "It was kind of frustrating to see that three-game lead come down to this and see San Diego kind of take off on us. But, hey, that's football." Well, hey, I guess he's right!

Eric Mangini, Rod Marinelli and Romeo Crennel: RIP.

17 - coaches


Blogger DDC said...
Great post!!! Man. What. A. Weekend. I think the Jets management is making a mistake firing Mangini. I'm not a huge fan of his or anything like that, but what did those guys really expect of that team and Brett Favre. If anything this will lead to another....I mean continued rebuilding. This team will never win anything without having a plan or patience to see that plan through. I don't get it. I'm also anxious to see what the Bears are going to do about their QB situation. Surely they won't go with the Orton/Grossman combo next season, for their fans sake I hope they won't.

Anonymous Don Paco said...
How about a specific WotFW(otrs) for Jay Cutler? Here's a quote from the AP:

“We did have to score,” quarterback Jay Cutler said. “They punted once, I think. It puts a lot of pressure on us.”

In other words: "Our &%# defense screwed me!!!! $%&%$ my defense!!!!"

And he looked like that in the game too. Whenever there was a shot of Cutler in the sidelines after a Chargers score, he looked like he was about to club a baby seal to death.

Anonymous kazam92 said...
oh just wonderful. great job.

oh and you guys are all welcome to convert to Penningtism with me. I am a believer

Blogger lordhenry said...
Damn, the Bretts were defeated, I realy wanted to see them get to the playoffs, would've been hilarious. But you can't blame it all on brett, I mean, who else is really on that team? It didn't seem to help green bay much to get rid of him.

Anonymous kazam92 said...
who else is on that team? Look at the freakin money they spent. Phins shut down T. Jones. Washington's a stud and they have 2 very good receivers.

Blogger Grayson said...
You were right about the Bucs and I was wrong.

They simply got worse and worse as the season went along on defense, especially on the defensive line. We had injuries just like everyone, but it looked like our entire defensive line wore down over the season until we couldn't even shut down Oakland's running game.

The offense did the same old mediocre thing all season, the big shift on the losing streak was the defensive performance.

Blogger AnacondaHL said...
From the Yahoo recap you posted, Patriots C Dan Koppen: “We can walk out of this locker room with our hats high,”

Yea, generally you want to hold your heads high when choking 18-0 to some scrub team, followed by a 11-5 non-playoff year.

Blogger BJ said...
An Open Letter to the Dallas Cowboys Fanbase,

By birth I am a Michigander, and for my sins I am a Lions fan. Your life might be in the pits, but you have not, repeat not, gotten the Grand Tour of the darkest shitpits of Hell.

I'm giving you a week to mourn. After that I don't want to hear it.


Blogger Junior said...
Your forget the fact that the Broncos managed to lose to both the Raiders and Chiefs during the season, so this make they the epic fail of the season

Anonymous kazam92 said...
Damn Shanahan got fired...after 21 years

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Want another reason to hate the saints? How about the fact that their uberpoor performance is going to lose Drew Brees his MVP. Of course, without him they're right up there with the Ohio and Michigan league of professional pantywastes.

If the Saints keep Brees, they had better make some damn off-season moves to improve their Kleenex defense.

Anonymous AK Dave said...
I was in N'owlens for the Saints game, and I can't believe that nobody is talking about the fact that the Panthers sugar-coated, gift-wrapped, and even put a fucking gold-coated cherry on top of the sundae that should have been Drew Brees' single season passing yards record and HE STILL FUCKED IT UP.

Carolina was aware of the record, and instead of running the game clock down to 1 or 2 seconds and kicking a GW field goal as time expired, they intentionally called a time out with 6 seconds to go so that there would still be time left for 1 play after the kickoff.

They then squib-kicked it out of bounds, giving NO a 1st and 10 from the 40 with 1 second left.

THEN they rushed 2 (TWO!!!) token down linemen, and dropped everybody else back 30 yards in prevent, essentially saying "here ya go, dude, throw it to the flat and we'll let him run 16 yards, you get the record, we get the win, everybody's happy".

Brees responds by throwing a shitball that lands behind his intended receiver. Game over. No record. WTF, dude. FAIL. I love DB, but he totally pissed that record away and Carolina did everything except throw the ball themselves to make it possible.

We need a name for this play. "The rejected gift" or "The big screw-up" or something. Matt- that's your department- witty tags for crappy sports play. Don't let me down, man! And don't let this monumental FAIL go unnoticed!

Anonymous kazam92 said...
nothing for the playoffs guys?

and chad pennington is still my god. Ed reed is just someone elses

Blogger Trev said...
Man love football edition:


Anonymous Anonymous said...



sickle cell case studies
mobile home roof sealers
download zmule mobile
free download king of sex city mobile
mobile home metal roofing
free ringtone downloads
aplication gratuite pour telephone windows mobile
3gp free porn lesbian mobile
camelot ring
mobile es
yahoo mobile messenger
alltel answer tones
mobile recovery software
verizon redemption code ringtone
mobile phone value chain
sickle cell anemia statistics
underage mobile porn
mtv mobile
how to connect mobile camera throw skype
bayfront homes for sale on eastern shore of mobile bay
mobile store in chicago il
skycell st88 cell phone
how to choose a wedding ring
ring gag blowjob video
tamil short ringtone
mobile xxx clips
myspace mobile
3gb video sex for mobile
mitza ring
optimal desktop - mobile edition 3.0.124
ring deal
nokia s40 mobile phone can edit excel file
vodafone ringtones
how do you find out what mobile phone network you are on in sweden
ring and ring cpa
spb mobile shell build 2637
cell phone zelda
day 26 ringtones
mobile tanning service
2 karat diamond ring
free adult mobile movie
plant cell parts
sprint cell phone columbia tribune free ads
cell free number people search
cell phone internal antenna
how to eat healthy and keep your body tone
cell phone jamming device
send picture from iphone to att cell
xbox red ring of death
camera mobile phone uk
mobile home for sale missouri
intitle index mp3 tones tunes
men masterbating mobile downloads
mobile me sign in
free black porna for mobile
trace mobile
building onto mobile home
healthy weight loss diet plan| lose weight tone muscles safely: weight loss diets
free bullet for my valentine ringtones
b cell lymphoma cutaneous
hindi movie tones
dare ring cumshots
digital mobile
porntube mobile
pentagram ring
how to find my lost cell phone
how to download ringtones to your sidekick
free vlc player download for window mobile htc
free animal porn for mobile phone
esn cell phone check
tracphone ringtones
mobile wallpapers nude pack
free porn clips for mobile blackberry
trace cell phone numbers free
nrj mobile
watch free mobile porn videos
mywaves xxx mobile clips.com
mobile worldwide shipping online store
n73 mcafee virusscan mobile
skin tones
russian funny ringtones
srilankan sinhala sex video download mobile
mobile video
virgin moble cell

Anonymous Anonymous said...
Gay porn website
gay bathhouses gay dating online gay hate crimes gay christian mobile gay chat